Alone

Sometimes when I'm all alone, I pretend your there, with your arms around me, holding me close. And I wish it was real, but then I open my eyes and I remember that your not here with me, your with some other girl, not regretting breaking my heart or anything else. Your happy, I have a broken heart.

People say I am using our break up for sympathy. I don't think I could do that, seeing our relationship fall apart in front of everyone was enough, I don't need to go looking for it. You even say that your sorry. I don't know why I can't believe you, probably because you never told me the truth before.

I just wish that sometimes I didn't have to be the strong one. I wish I could be the one who could just break down, just once. But that won't happen. The one time it did, all I got was a shrug from be 'best friend', and maybe a few pitiful glances. I have to stay strong, and get over you, even though it will be hard, I know I can do it. I am only in middle school, how hard can if be to get over your first love?

It's not like I am alone now. I know at school everyone thinks that I am the perfect one. The one with all the friends in the world, the one with the perfect looks and the perfect grades. But why can't they see past my fake smile and my witty remarks and see how much you hurt me? Why am I the antagonist in this, while your seen as the victim. You broke my heart, and I'm getting trashed for it. And thanks to you, I learned a life lesson, when your on top of the world, your really just digging your own grave. The more popular you are, the easier it is to take you down. I learned the hard way.

When  I am all alone, I think that I am in your arms again, but then I open my eyes. Tears fall down my cheeks and I remember that you cheated on me. Your not mine anymore, you never were. You were my biggest mistake. But I am over it, I am the strong one, the one no one comforts.

(To my readers I am sorry but I just went through a pretty bad break up and all of this is true, I am not exactly all that loved right now, and I needed to be able to vent. I hope you understand and don't think I'm just a whiny person.)